I recently talked with a Mitzvah mom who had a terrible experience with a planner. She said she felt bullied and pushed into doing things that she didn’t really want “because that’s the way it’s done.” She said that “our party was lovely, but it wasn’t really the party we wanted.” I was completely appalled. Here’s what I believe:
There’s no one right way to do a Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah
I don’t believe there is a formula or a list of things that must happen at your event. Each event is special and unique because…
Each family and child I work with are special and unique
You are individuals with your own taste, needs and likes. I’ve never worked with another family like yours because there isn’t another family exactly like yours. I want your event to reflect your family’s values and your child’s personality, not some cookie-cutter mold.
It’s YOUR Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah, not mine
I want you to have the event of your dreams and I’m there to coach you through the process. I’ll certainly offer suggestions based on my experience along the way (that’s what you’re hiring me for, right?). And I’ll definitely tell you about any potential issues I see, but you can make your own decisions about what is right for your event when you have all of the facts in front of you.
The right fit when working with a planner is key to having the event that feels like you. Ask questions. Get a good feel for the planner. And trust your gut. Make sure before you even sign a contract that you get a good feeling from the planner and it’s much more likely that everything will work out perfectly.